tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17543440467401140532023-12-18T05:22:16.315-05:00OLD AGE JOKES or HUMOUR FOR THE CHRONOLOGICALLY GIFTED - Your choice!One of the Web's newest and best collections of funny jokes, funny videos, jokes about sex and old age, funny trivia and Free funny email forwards for THE GOLDEN YEARS - seniors, Golden Oldies, young at heart, old folkes, old age, advanced age, growing old, aging, elderly people, aged, octogenarians, mature. Basically, jokes for older people. Humour is the best medicine. Hope you find it as therapy, too! (Notice the large print?)Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger259125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-86579241152724475302018-07-31T07:55:00.001-04:002018-07-31T07:55:04.147-04:00YOU KNOW YOU'RE OLD WHEN...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-90278238788194810482016-04-28T06:43:00.003-04:002016-04-28T06:43:43.801-04:00I WISH...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-35391029283022634892016-01-28T09:50:00.001-05:002016-01-28T09:50:01.334-05:00CURSIVE WRITING and NURSING HOMES<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-13120360703766353952016-01-28T09:44:00.000-05:002016-01-28T09:44:26.572-05:00My Grandma Started Walking Every Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-43603107967431414432016-01-08T13:42:00.002-05:002016-01-08T13:42:26.560-05:00My Kids Have it So Easy<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-4916391229233289932016-01-08T13:40:00.002-05:002016-01-08T13:40:55.240-05:00How to Live Longer<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-84843466924022225252015-11-01T16:55:00.001-05:002015-11-01T16:56:26.561-05:00MY CHILDHOOD<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 24pt;">Whoever wrote this must have been my next door neighbor because it nearly describes my childhood to a 'T.' Hope you enjoy it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 48pt;">Black and White</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Black and White</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">(Under age 40? You won't understand.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">You could hardly see for all the snow,</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Spread the rabbit ears as far as they go.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">'Good Night, David.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Good Night, Chet!’</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get food poisoning.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter and I used to eat it raw sometimes, too. Our school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper in a brown paper bag, not in ice pack coolers, but I can't remember getting<span style="color: blue;">e.co</span>li, or even know what it was.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Almost all of us would</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">have rather gone swimming in the lake or the river (where farmer’s cattle cooled off in hot weather too) instead of a pristine pool. Talk about boring; no beach closures then, and we didn’t ‘catch’ anything either!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">The term cell phone would have conjured up a phone in a jail cell, and a pager was the school PA system.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">We all took gym, not PE... and risked permanent injury with a pair of high top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having cross-training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built in light reflectors. I can't recall any injuries but they must have happened because they tell us how much safer we are now. Flunking gym was not an option, even for mentally challenged kids! I guess PE must be much harder than gym.</span> </div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Speaking of school, we all said prayers and sang the national anthem, and staying in detention after school caught all sorts of negative attention.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">We must have had horribly damaged psyches. What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school nurses?</span> <span style="font-size: 32pt;">Ours wore a hat and everything.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something before I was allowed to be proud of myself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">I just can't recall how bored we were without computers, Play Station, Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital TV cable stations.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Oh yeah... And where was the Benadryl and sterilization kit when I got that bee sting? I could have been killed!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">We played 'King of the Hill' on piles of gravel left on vacant construction sites (or snow banks left by the snow plow) , and if we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48-cent bottle of mercurochrome (kids liked it better because it didn't sting like iodine did) and then we got our butt spanked.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">Now it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $49+ bottle of antibiotics, and then Mom calls the attorney to sue the contractor or public service office for leaving a horribly vicious pile of ‘stuff’ where it was such a threat.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either; because if we did we got our butt spanked there and then we got our butt spanked again when we got home.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">I recall Donny Reynolds from next door coming over and doing his tricks on the front stoop, just before he fell off.</span> <span style="font-size: 32pt;">Little did his Mom know that she could have owned our house. Instead, she picked him up and swatted him for being such a goof. It was a neighborhood run amuck.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that they were from a dysfunctional family.</span> <span style="font-size: 32pt;">How could we possibly have known that?</span> <span style="font-size: 32pt;">We needed to get into group therapy and anger management classes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">We were obviously so duped by so many societal ills, that we didn't even</span> <span style="font-size: 32pt;">notice that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 32pt;">How did we ever survive?<b></b></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #fb0007; font-size: 28pt;">LOVE TO ALL OF US WHO SHARED THIS ERA; AND TO ALL WHO DIDN'T, SORRY FOR WHAT YOU MISSED. I WOULDN'T TRADE IT FOR ANYTHING!</span></b><span style="font-size: 28pt;"></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: 32pt;">Pass this to someone and remember that life's most simple pleasures are very often the best.</span></b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-2777657710050687182015-01-11T16:51:00.001-05:002015-03-27T16:08:33.624-04:00PickleBall What a Great Sport For Seniors<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<h3 style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #38761d;">PickleBall What a Great Sport For Seniors</span></span></h3>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5Dogjrli-MY/VLLwHW0IMRI/AAAAAAAAthU/wafxzxw-wVE/s1600/pickleball.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5Dogjrli-MY/VLLwHW0IMRI/AAAAAAAAthU/wafxzxw-wVE/s1600/pickleball.jpg" /></a></div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 0.8em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="color: blue; line-height: 1.5;">There are many reasons why pickleball is GROWING in North America.</strong></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 0.8em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="color: blue; line-height: 1.5;">It’s fun, friendly, and great exercise.</strong></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2015/01/pickleball-great-sport/" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="I love pickle ball rebus" class="wp-image-43503 size-full" src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/I-love-pickle-ball-rebus.jpg" height="144" style="border: none; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" width="303" /></a><br />
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Pickleball What a Great Sport</div>
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<h1 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.8em; line-height: 1; margin: 10px 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: green; font-family: inherit; font-size: 27.2000007629395px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="color: blue; line-height: 1.5;"><span style="border: 0px; color: green; font-family: inherit; font-size: 27.2000007629395px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">I Relish Pickleball</span></strong></span></h1>
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<strong style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; line-height: 1.5;"><span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><b>Pickleball</b> is a <a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Racquet_sport" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Racquet sport">racquet sport</a> that combines elements of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Badminton" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Badminton">badminton</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tennis" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Tennis">tennis</a>, and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Table_tennis" style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Table tennis">table tennis</a>. Pickleball is a sport in which two or four players use solid paddles made of wood or composite materials to hit a perforated polymer ball, similar to a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wiffle_ball" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Wiffle ball">wiffle ball</a>, over a net. The sport shares features of other racquet sports, the dimensions and layout of a badminton court, and a net and rules similar to tennis, with a few modifications. Pickleball was invented in the mid 1960s as a children’s backyard pastime but quickly became popular among adults as a fun game for players of all skill levels. ~wikipedia</span></strong></div>
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<strong style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; line-height: 1.5;"><span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Also, you may enjoy this site about National Anthems, National Anthem Lyrics and National Flags:</span></strong></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 15.1999988555908px; line-height: 20.7272720336914px;"><b><a href="http://www.anthemworld.com/">http://www.anthemworld.com/</a></b></span></span></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-1328454327796723282014-12-29T15:36:00.001-05:002014-12-29T15:37:57.403-05:00The Back Nine<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="background-color: white; display: inline; font-family: Calibri; font-size: small;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Comic Sans MS; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>THE BACK NINE ...</strong></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>I FIRST STARTED READING THIS EMAIL & WAS READING FAST UNTIL I REACHED THE THIRD SENTENCE. I STOPPED</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>AND STARTED OVER READING SLOWER AND THINKING ABOUT EVERY WORD. THIS EMAIL IS VERY THOUGHT PROVOKING.</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>MAKES YOU STOP AND THINK. <u>READ SLOWLY</u>!</strong></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-90meXlPEm1w/TKNCo7nb1xI/AAAAAAAABwQ/vju8aqIv0fg/s1600/Old+Lady+Hat-joke.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-90meXlPEm1w/TKNCo7nb1xI/AAAAAAAABwQ/vju8aqIv0fg/s1600/Old+Lady+Hat-joke.jpeg" title="Senior wisdom" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Back Nine...</td></tr>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong><br /><br />AND THEN IT IS WINTER ...</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>You know ... time has a way of moving quickly and catching you unaware<br />of the passing years. It seems just yesterday that I was young, just<br />married and embarking on my new life with my mate. Yet in a way, it<br />seems like eons ago, and I wonder where all the years went. I know<br />that I lived them all. I have glimpses of how it was back then and of<br />all my hopes and dreams.<br /><br />But, here it is... the back nine of my life and it catches me by<br />surprise...How did I get here so fast? Where did the years go and<br />where did my youth go?<br /><br />I remember well seeing older people through the years and thinking<br />that those older people were years away from me and that I was only on<br />the first hole and the back nine was so far off that I could not<br />fathom it or imagine fully what it would be like.<br /><br />But, here it is...my friends are retired and getting gray...they move<br />slower and I see an older person now. Some are in better and some<br />worse shape than me...but, I see the great change...Not like the ones<br />that I remember who were young and vibrant...but, like me, their age<br />is beginning to show and we are now those older folks that we used to<br />see and never thought we'd become.<br /><br />Each day now, I find that just getting a shower is a real target for<br />the day! And taking a nap is not a treat anymore... it's mandatory!<br />Cause if I don't on my own free will... I just fall asleep where I sit!<br /><br />And so...now I enter into this new season of my life unprepared for<br />all the aches and pains and the loss of strength and ability to go and<br />do things that I wish I had done but never did!! But, at least I know,<br />that though I’m on the back nine, and I'm not sure how long it will<br />last...this I know, that when it's over on this earth...it's over. A<br />new adventure will begin! Yes, I have regrets. There are things I wish<br />I hadn't done...things I should have done, but indeed, there are many<br />things I'm happy to have done. It's all in a lifetime.<br /><br />So, if you're not on the back nine yet...let me remind you, that it<br />will be here faster than you think. So, whatever you would like to<br />accomplish in your life please do it quickly! Don't put things off too<br />long!! Life goes by quickly. So, do what you can today, as you can<br />never be sure whether you’re on the back nine or not!<br /><br />You have no promise that you will see all the seasons of your<br />life...so, live for today and say all the things that you want your<br />loved ones to remember...and hope that they appreciate and love you<br />for all the things that you have done for them in all the years past!!<br /><br />"Life" is a gift to you. The way you live your life is your gift to<br />those who come after. Make it a fantastic one. LIVE IT WELL! ENJOY<br />TODAY! DO SOMETHING FUN! BE HAPPY! HAVE A GREAT DAY!</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>Remember "It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver .</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>LIVE HAPPY IN 2015!<br /><br />LASTLY, CONSIDER THIS:</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>~Your kids are becoming you......but your grandchildren are perfect!<br />~Going out is good.. Coming home is better!<br />~You forget names.... But it's OK because some people forgot they even<br />knew you!!!<br />~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything like golf.<br />~The things you used to care to do, you aren't as interested in<br />anymore, but you really do care that you aren't as interested.<br />~You sleep better on a lounge chair with the TV 'ON' than in bed. It's<br />called "pre-sleep".<br />~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF"<br />switch..<br />~You tend to use more 4 letter words ... "what?"..."when?"... ???<br />~You notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!<br />~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.<br />~Everybody whispers.<br />~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet.... 2 of which you will never wear.<br />~~~But Old is good in some things: Old Songs, Old movies, and best of all,</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><strong>OLD FRIENDS !!<br /><br />Stay well, "OLD FRIEND!" Send this on to other "Old Friends!" and let<br />them laugh in AGREEMENT!!! It's Not What You Gather, But What You<br />Scatter That Tells What Kind Of Life You Have Lived.<br /><br />TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN; YET THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE, SO ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.<br />“Do Not Regret Growing Older. It is a Privilege Denied to Many.”</strong></span></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-75066197995350427242014-12-09T17:10:00.002-05:002014-12-09T17:14:22.591-05:00Longevity Advice to heed<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 22.3999996185303px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Longevity Advice to heed… </span></h2>
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<strong>107 Yrs. old</strong></div>
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Longevity Advice to heed</div>
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<strong>“For better digestion, I drink beer. </strong></div>
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<strong>In the case of appetite loss, I drink white wine. </strong></div>
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<strong>In the case of low blood pressure, I drink red wine.</strong></div>
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<strong>In the case of high blood pressure, I drink scotch. </strong></div>
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<strong>And when I have a cold, I drink schnapps.”</strong></div>
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<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15.1999998092651px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong>“When do you drink water?”</strong></span></div>
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<strong>“I’ve never been that sick.”</strong></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-58985137358079682002014-10-31T13:20:00.002-04:002014-10-31T13:20:41.948-04:00Halloween Rules for Seniors <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<strong><span data-mce-style="color: #ff9900;" style="color: #ff9900;"><span lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="halloween rules funny" class="aligncenter wp-image-43328 size-medium" data-mce-src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/halloween-rules-funny-300x134.jpg" height="134" src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/halloween-rules-funny-300x134.jpg" style="display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="300" /></a></span></span></strong></h2>
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<strong><span data-mce-style="color: #ff9900;" style="color: #ff9900;"><span lang="EN-CA">Halloween Rules for Seniors </span></span></strong></h2>
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<span data-mce-style="color: #222222;" style="color: #222222;">You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when:</span></h3>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Halloween Rules for Seniors" class="CToWUd alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.1&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_hZaFmGzSWhlGCdyqGcO68YbJxUEd4MTdRLXyi7IWM6PdnE10gD7t0yO2C9VcY3SGXoL1qV1WrlyoGBjJggh-3x3DDG3vR6KCpMwjoEckqB3e1INJ0dTW8NBc&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="138" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.1&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_hZaFmGzSWhlGCdyqGcO68YbJxUEd4MTdRLXyi7IWM6PdnE10gD7t0yO2C9VcY3SGXoL1qV1WrlyoGBjJggh-3x3DDG3vR6KCpMwjoEckqB3e1INJ0dTW8NBc&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="434" /></a><br clear="none" /><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Halloween Rules for Seniors" class="CToWUd alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.2&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8Oq4eOgZITHKqL0ofJ0PkagmnD_ySZ9bVcoQYW-rUR-O2d-Irsi-ZVZfPVFvpJoyA2BZILgEMSIPkOhFbRaLQKD-pFj8sLPBwFJz1X7_CqLTKnupQwh-obZyk&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="161" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.2&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8Oq4eOgZITHKqL0ofJ0PkagmnD_ySZ9bVcoQYW-rUR-O2d-Irsi-ZVZfPVFvpJoyA2BZILgEMSIPkOhFbRaLQKD-pFj8sLPBwFJz1X7_CqLTKnupQwh-obZyk&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="175" /></a></span></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="text-decoration: underline;" style="text-decoration: underline;"><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when</span></span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">:</span></b><span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><br clear="none" /></span><span data-mce-style="color: blue;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: blue;"><br clear="none" /></span><b><span data-mce-style="color: blue;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: blue;">10. You keep knocking on your own front door.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Funny Halloween Costumes gif" class="CToWUd a6T alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.3&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8p4Lek_RdBY6hQBkKaIBXq7KFkK0LFpLitUtXLjGfnpUvevBIw4UoxrtbRvkoopz3BsLvtdTQlSGgynei3Q4MCBcMjbBAfW5Wa1rIOshxgP6AP2aunmLHFmf4&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" data-mce-tabindex="0" height="326" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.3&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8p4Lek_RdBY6hQBkKaIBXq7KFkK0LFpLitUtXLjGfnpUvevBIw4UoxrtbRvkoopz3BsLvtdTQlSGgynei3Q4MCBcMjbBAfW5Wa1rIOshxgP6AP2aunmLHFmf4&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889573&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="350" /></a></span></span><div class="a6S" dir="ltr">
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: teal;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: teal;">9. You remove your false teeth to change your appearance.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Funny ghosr Halloween Rules" class="CToWUd a6T alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.4&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8nZkpTUi_27E4S2zO0_gfZLPxEhDJZAoKC6mWct6ed8ss5TgIbgODq3YOSeup_ZWKusFqaCMbpuiy579jd9D_TST6rdOFbEaqgecjbmqztk3F_Pr9Qxd6feJo&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" data-mce-tabindex="0" height="263" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.4&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ8nZkpTUi_27E4S2zO0_gfZLPxEhDJZAoKC6mWct6ed8ss5TgIbgODq3YOSeup_ZWKusFqaCMbpuiy579jd9D_TST6rdOFbEaqgecjbmqztk3F_Pr9Qxd6feJo&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="251" /></a></span></span><div class="a6S" dir="ltr">
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: navy;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: navy;">8. You ask for soft high fibre candy</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: navy;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: navy;"> </span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: navy;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: navy;">only</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: gray;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: grey;">.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Pumpkin carving gif" class="CToWUd alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.5&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-wZ0S3wmW18c8sNLSEq2m_HjcJFFT4bhvfQ_OkiUSUk2thI-O3qfzNNSBs1G8g5f6OZYqavjqFpfIWbcP2r0JGD6IynFo8YxXaL9ofstzw9C32ZLxeMaZgKyk&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="236" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.5&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-wZ0S3wmW18c8sNLSEq2m_HjcJFFT4bhvfQ_OkiUSUk2thI-O3qfzNNSBs1G8g5f6OZYqavjqFpfIWbcP2r0JGD6IynFo8YxXaL9ofstzw9C32ZLxeMaZgKyk&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="241" /></a></span></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag,</span></b></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">you lose your balance and fall over.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><br clear="none" /><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Halloween gif good" class="CToWUd alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.6&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_YqaWqrVd6IudBYGO195cAx9h-C6eCiRdzI1_rp0R6MTNwhmD2KXh_FUKNaIqJwrPuepo0Ahevjr1fcy8rTQYa32x56D7vV8UCe6310nKVpJVWu1TwYtMJpdU&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="114" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.6&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_YqaWqrVd6IudBYGO195cAx9h-C6eCiRdzI1_rp0R6MTNwhmD2KXh_FUKNaIqJwrPuepo0Ahevjr1fcy8rTQYa32x56D7vV8UCe6310nKVpJVWu1TwYtMJpdU&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="322" /></a></span></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: green;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: green;">6. People say...'Great Boris Karloff Mask,' <br clear="none" />And you're not wearing a mask.</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><br clear="none" /></span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: green;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: green;">. </span></b><div class="mceTemp">
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<dt class="wp-caption-dt" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><img alt="Boo Glitter" class="CToWUd a6T" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.7&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ9dfdysBBror5F9xzWW7QUbwl7Mii6ckWP0M7_YjC07rJ8zDI3CYV3xnUqyhVdyPxJijoVnpXEbo43lKs7ZEXWz5tXU0GPwXyCXGmtwSh315jRvgZw-bGVLiQg&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" data-mce-tabindex="0" height="212" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.7&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ9dfdysBBror5F9xzWW7QUbwl7Mii6ckWP0M7_YjC07rJ8zDI3CYV3xnUqyhVdyPxJijoVnpXEbo43lKs7ZEXWz5tXU0GPwXyCXGmtwSh315jRvgZw-bGVLiQg&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889574&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" width="387" /></a></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 11px; line-height: 17px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px 4px 5px;">Halloween Rules for Seniors</dd></dl>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">5. When the door opens you yell, 'Trick or...'</span></b></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">And you can't remember the rest.</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;"><br clear="none" /></span></b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;"><br clear="none" /></span><b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">4. By the end of the</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;"> </span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">night,</span></b></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">you have a bag full of restraining orders.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="Happy Halloween Gif great" class="CToWUd a6T alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.8&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_aRA2vXAIrnrnDlEy7ynENPA4ZpD-adVR5wxSRfHA-G72Y0yyCrF7-ChTOEinFFfZrPYT6UOZAay2tSqpkBE5lqJ22cWfr4PiWRGctcwobrRsg03vdAs4QT8U&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" data-mce-tabindex="0" height="400" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.8&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ_aRA2vXAIrnrnDlEy7ynENPA4ZpD-adVR5wxSRfHA-G72Y0yyCrF7-ChTOEinFFfZrPYT6UOZAay2tSqpkBE5lqJ22cWfr4PiWRGctcwobrRsg03vdAs4QT8U&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="400" /></a></span></span><div class="a6S" dir="ltr">
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<span data-mce-style="color: purple;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: purple;"><br clear="none" /></span><b><span data-mce-style="color: purple;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: purple;">3. You have to carefully choose a costume that</span></b></div>
<div align="center" data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px; line-height: 19px;">
<b><span data-mce-style="color: purple;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: purple;">doesn't dislodge your hairpiece.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><br clear="none" /></span><div class="mceTemp">
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<dt class="wp-caption-dt" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><img alt="Old man gif" class="CToWUd" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.9&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-KpNdinse-fpvtfcaujwU_Zt6c4IqyoArgSYbe2g6W6Q7pde-530uCxVRvYQPiOOTEHAMVWoGo08injycM5a35Y8EHS7eKVZzX5qYrLcgH97jF9yswSbVjcaA&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="120" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.9&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-KpNdinse-fpvtfcaujwU_Zt6c4IqyoArgSYbe2g6W6Q7pde-530uCxVRvYQPiOOTEHAMVWoGo08injycM5a35Y8EHS7eKVZzX5qYrLcgH97jF9yswSbVjcaA&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" width="87" /></a></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 11px; line-height: 17px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px 4px 5px;">Halloween Rules for Seniors</dd></dl>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: olive;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: olive;">2. You're the only Power Ranger in the</span></b></div>
<div align="center" data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px; line-height: 19px;">
<b><span data-mce-style="color: olive;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: olive;">neighbourhood with a walker.</span></b></div>
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<dt class="wp-caption-dt" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" style="-webkit-user-drag: none;"><img alt="Pumpkin gif halloween rules" class="CToWUd" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.10&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-T4DVA9a1jL3x2milffUMcIu1oLW_gFuNBwMXwz1P9vHbSgy55yu0bTQ6h5dKfaq2rso7oF8HlGGbl-28EoQBTlorE_f-ITW0ctlMgi1YrieYB_mP_tcMOTb0&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="175" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.10&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-T4DVA9a1jL3x2milffUMcIu1oLW_gFuNBwMXwz1P9vHbSgy55yu0bTQ6h5dKfaq2rso7oF8HlGGbl-28EoQBTlorE_f-ITW0ctlMgi1YrieYB_mP_tcMOTb0&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; border: 0px none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" width="175" /></a></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd" style="-webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 11px; line-height: 17px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px 4px 5px;">Halloween Rules for Seniors</dd></dl>
</div>
</div>
<div align="center" data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px; line-height: 19px;">
<b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">And the number one reason Seniors <span data-mce-style="text-decoration: underline;" style="text-decoration: underline;">should not</span></span></b></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">go</span></b></div>
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<b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;">Trick Or Treating...</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: green;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: green;"><br clear="none" />*</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;"><br clear="none" />*</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: maroon;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: maroon;"><br clear="none" />*</span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: teal;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: teal;"><br clear="none" /></span></b><b><span data-mce-style="color: teal;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: teal;">1. You keep having to go home to pee.</span></b></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: black;" lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="halloween witch gif" class="CToWUd alignnone" data-mce-src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.11&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-oteK4WRQEWe63Lf-FrbTrjvp56LO5O56FTcw9jk-D4Lgt3z_Edx2XK1gXKVBq-k0EMqWyujLmGuGBHT0hx_T0LCO-hJUMoVOygXc9SmRHr9Zblygp04mggCQ&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" height="209" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=67267e622b&view=fimg&th=14967090e296b242&attid=0.11&disp=emb&attbid=ANGjdJ-oteK4WRQEWe63Lf-FrbTrjvp56LO5O56FTcw9jk-D4Lgt3z_Edx2XK1gXKVBq-k0EMqWyujLmGuGBHT0hx_T0LCO-hJUMoVOygXc9SmRHr9Zblygp04mggCQ&sz=w1600-h1000&ats=1414772889575&rm=14967090e296b242&zw&atsh=1" width="298" /></a></span></div>
<div align="center" data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px; line-height: 19px;">
<span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;"><br clear="none" /></span><b><span data-mce-style="color: red;" lang="EN-CA" style="color: red;">No matter, have a <span data-mce-style="text-decoration: underline;" style="text-decoration: underline;">HAPPY HALLOWEEN</span> anyway...</span></b></div>
<div align="center" data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.8000001907349px; line-height: 19px;">
<br /></div>
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<a data-mce-href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/" href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/10/halloween-rules-seniors/"><img alt="happy halloween gif" class="aligncenter wp-image-43325 size-full" data-mce-src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/happy-halloween.gif" height="138" src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/happy-halloween.gif" style="display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="434" /></a></div>
Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-36259925955230764912014-09-22T08:22:00.001-04:002014-09-22T08:23:01.279-04:00A walk down memory lane <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Corbel, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, FreeSans, 'Liberation Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 26.25px;">-- Author Unknown</span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TaSBhU14Iew/VCAUYX3_ptI/AAAAAAAAbDc/dEr8hGOkxxc/s1600/memory+lane.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TaSBhU14Iew/VCAUYX3_ptI/AAAAAAAAbDc/dEr8hGOkxxc/s1600/memory+lane.jpg" height="214" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Corbel, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, FreeSans, 'Liberation Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 26.25px;">A little house with three bedrooms and one car on the street,</span><br />
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A mower that you had to push to make the grass look neat.</div>
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In the kitchen on the wall we only had one phone,<br />
And no need for recording things, someone was always home.</div>
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We only had a living room where we would congregate,<br />
Unless it was at mealtime in the kitchen where we ate.</div>
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We had no need for family rooms or extra rooms to dine,<br />
When meeting as a family those two rooms would work out fine.</div>
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We only had one TV set, and channels maybe two,<br />
But always there was one of them with something worth the view.</div>
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For snacks we had potato chips that tasted like a chip,<br />
And if you wanted flavor there was Lipton's onion dip.</div>
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Store-bought snacks were rare because my mother liked to cook,<br />
And nothing can compare to snacks in Betty Crockery's book.</div>
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The snacks were even healthy with the best ingredients,<br />
No labels with a hundred things that make not a bit of sense.</div>
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Weekends were for family trips or staying home to play,<br />
We all did things together -- even go to church to pray.</div>
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When we did our weekend trips depending on the weather,<br />
No one stayed at home because we liked to be together.</div>
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Sometimes we would separate to do things on our own,<br />
But we knew where the others were without our own cell phone.</div>
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Then there were the movies with your favorite movie star,<br />
And nothing can compare to watching movies in your car.</div>
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Then there were the picnics at the peak of summer season,<br />
Pack a lunch and find some trees and never need a reason.</div>
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Get a baseball game together with all the friends you know,<br />
Have real action playing ball -- and no game video.</div>
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Remember when the doctor used to be the family friend,<br />
And didn't need insurance or a lawyer to defend?</div>
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The way that he took care of you or what he had to do,<br />
Because he took an oath and strived to do the best for you.</div>
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Remember going to the store and shopping casually,<br />
And when you went to pay for it you used your own money?</div>
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Nothing that you had to swipe or punch in some amount,<br />
Remember when the cashier person had to really count?</div>
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Remember when we breathed the air; it smelled so fresh and clean,<br />
And chemicals were not used on the grass to keep it green.</div>
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The milkman used to go from door to door,<br />
And it was just a few cents more than going to the store.</div>
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There was a time when mailed letters came right to your door,<br />
Without a lot of junk mail ads sent out by every store.</div>
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The mailman knew each house by name and knew where it was sent;<br />
There were not loads of mail addressed to "present occupant."</div>
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Remember when the words "I do" meant that you really did,<br />
And not just temporarily "til someone blows their lid."</div>
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T'was no such thing as "no one's fault; we just made a mistake,"<br />
There was a time when married life was built on give and take.</div>
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There was a time when just one glance was all that it would take,<br />
And you would know the kind of car, the model and the make.</div>
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They didn't look like turtles trying to squeeze out every mile;<br />
They were streamlined, white walls, fins, and really had some style.</div>
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One time the music that you played whenever you would jive,<br />
Was from a vinyl, big-holed record called a forty-five.</div>
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The record player had a post to keep them all in line,<br />
And then the records would drop down and play one at a time.</div>
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Oh sure, we had our problems then, just like we do today,<br />
And always we were striving, trying for a better way.</div>
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And every year that passed us by brought new and greater things,<br />
We now can even program phones with music or with rings.</div>
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Oh, the simple life we lived still seems like so much fun,<br />
How can you explain a game, just kick the can and run?</div>
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And why would boys put baseball cards between bicycle spokes,<br />
And for a nickel red machines had little bottled Cokes?</div>
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This life seemed so much easier and slower in some ways,<br />
I love the new technology but I sure miss those days.</div>
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So, time moves on and so do we, and nothing stays the same,<br />
But I sure love to reminisce and walk down memory lane.</div>
Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-931831446772270972014-06-13T10:39:00.003-04:002014-06-13T10:39:20.155-04:00Back to Work After 30 Years<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"><b><span lang="EN-CA">The shortest video you've ever seen ...</span></b></span></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"> </span></div>
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<div data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 19px;">
<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"><b><span lang="EN-CA">A woman goes back to work after thirty years.</span></b></span></div>
<div data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 19px;">
<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"> </span></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"><b><span lang="EN-CA">This vide</span></b><b><span lang="EN-CA">o is only 5 seconds long, but, you'll get it.</span></b></span></div>
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<div data-mce-style="color: #000000;" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 19px;">
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<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"> </span></div>
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<span data-mce-style="color: #008000;" style="color: green;"><b><span lang="EN-CA">If you're younger than 40, you probably won't understand it.</span></b></span></div>
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<h3 style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; line-height: 19px;">
<strong><span data-mce-style="color: #0000ff;" style="color: blue;"><span lang="EN-CA"><a data-mce-href="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qteu4ld_SCE?rel=0" data-mce-style="color: #1155cc;" href="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qteu4ld_SCE?rel=0" rel="nofollow" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank" title="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qteu4ld_SCE?rel=0"><span data-mce-style="color: #0000ff;" style="color: blue;">www.youtube.com/embed/<wbr></wbr>qteu4ld_SCE?rel=0</span></a></span><span lang="EN-CA">"</span></span></strong></h3>
Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-90421409417982490022014-03-10T08:13:00.000-04:002014-03-10T08:13:15.567-04:00How to Remember Your Computer Password<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aUdFMmkiYJs/Ux2sHG6z8KI/AAAAAAAAD6c/I6lB1pJwzZc/s1600/computer+password+for+seniors.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aUdFMmkiYJs/Ux2sHG6z8KI/AAAAAAAAD6c/I6lB1pJwzZc/s1600/computer+password+for+seniors.jpg" height="320" width="297" /></a></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-69218842024372687942014-03-09T20:52:00.000-04:002014-03-09T20:52:12.327-04:00How To Stay Young<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">If you really want to know </span></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MSR-hcqLYlE/Ux0MRbixp3I/AAAAAAAAD6A/kNZYXFCmK9I/s1600/Confused_baby.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MSR-hcqLYlE/Ux0MRbixp3I/AAAAAAAAD6A/kNZYXFCmK9I/s1600/Confused_baby.jpeg" height="212" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">how to stay young, </span></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">check out the following site.</span></b></div>
<br />
<a href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/03/how-to-stay-young/"><b><br /></b></a>
<b><a href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/03/how-to-stay-young/">http://www.e-forwards.com/2014/03/how-to-stay-young/Golden Years Humor</a></b><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-17837708690334859162013-12-21T15:17:00.003-05:002013-12-21T15:17:38.001-05:00Grandparents are Special<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b><span style="color: red;">What a Great Sign about Grandchildren and Grandparents!!!</span></b><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vKH4kNmTluk/UrX3RTPOStI/AAAAAAAAD1k/bvC6mLlITa0/s1600/grandparents+good+time.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="124" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vKH4kNmTluk/UrX3RTPOStI/AAAAAAAAD1k/bvC6mLlITa0/s320/grandparents+good+time.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-53096121879573844802013-08-16T07:40:00.001-04:002013-08-16T07:40:31.833-04:00The Wit of Phyllis<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-lvf3bs_lPEo/Ug4PqRNSQQI/AAAAAAAADfo/ywBHfVKKOMw/s1600/Phyllis+Diller_one+liners+funny.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-lvf3bs_lPEo/Ug4PqRNSQQI/AAAAAAAADfo/ywBHfVKKOMw/s1600/Phyllis+Diller_one+liners+funny.jpg" /></a></div>
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<blockquote style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;" type="cite">
<div style="font-family: tahoma, 'new york', times, serif; font-size: 14pt;">
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<div style="font-family: 'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; font-size: 12pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><blockquote style="border-left-color: blue; border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 2px; margin-left: 5px; padding-left: 5px;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial;"><div dir="ltr">
<div lang="EN-US">
<blockquote style="margin-bottom: 5pt; margin-top: 5pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b>Diller</b><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">You know you're old if your walker has an airbag.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b>Diller</b><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.</span></b><b><br /></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor .</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller </span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b>Phyllis Diller</b><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /><b> </b></span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;">You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: 'Cooper Black', serif; font-size: 18pt;"><br /></span></b><b><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;">Phyllis Diller</span></b></blockquote>
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</div>
</blockquote>
Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-88485564878336755942013-08-06T15:13:00.004-04:002013-08-06T15:14:47.005-04:00New Use for iPad<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<h3 dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; line-height: 19px;">
<span data-mce-style="color: #0000ff;" style="color: blue;">New Technology</span></h3>
<h3 dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; line-height: 19px;">
I was visiting my daughter and son-in-law last night when I asked if I could<br />borrow a newspaper.</h3>
<h3 style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; line-height: 19px;">
'This is the 21st century, old man,' she said. 'We don't waste money on<br />newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad.'</h3>
<h3 style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; line-height: 19px;">
Well I can tell you, that bloody fly never knew what hit it.</h3>
Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-48870917164333578572013-06-24T07:47:00.003-04:002013-06-24T07:47:57.309-04:00Middle Age<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-36798210662263439812013-03-13T08:24:00.001-04:002013-03-13T08:24:46.133-04:00Beautiful Quote About Friendship and Getting Old<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U1PtS8uGg-4/UUBvwoLb-_I/AAAAAAAADPs/a-gE6SOw-NY/s1600/Old+age+friends.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U1PtS8uGg-4/UUBvwoLb-_I/AAAAAAAADPs/a-gE6SOw-NY/s320/Old+age+friends.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br /><br />Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-33157424777684313022013-03-11T09:57:00.003-04:002013-03-11T09:57:57.444-04:00Happy National Nap Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<h4 style="text-align: left;">
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<span style="color: blue;">National Nap Day???</span></div>
<span style="color: blue;"><div style="text-align: center;">
I thought everyday was Nap Day!</div>
</span></h4>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eP3wd8mXLZc/UT3ivs2CiWI/AAAAAAAADPc/fpSYkFbH44M/s1600/nap+day-power+nap+funny+sign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eP3wd8mXLZc/UT3ivs2CiWI/AAAAAAAADPc/fpSYkFbH44M/s320/nap+day-power+nap+funny+sign.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-78774594501585741552013-02-24T08:25:00.001-05:002013-02-24T08:25:53.081-05:00Embracing the Hi Tech Revolution<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">I decided that, after incredible pressure </span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">from the children and grandchildren,</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Grandma and I</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">should embrace the Hi tech revolution.</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">I'll ask the kids for a new</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Apple iCar</span> for Father’s Day…</span></h3>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 0.8em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2013/02/grandpa-and-grandma-go-hi-tech/" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: initial; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="icar-prediction" class="aligncenter wp-image-38843" height="392" src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/icar-prediction.jpeg" style="border: none; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px auto; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Icar for Grandpa humor" width="576" /></a></div>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">And I told them that I was sure that Grandma would be delighted to get</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">( instead of a new vacuum cleaner )</span></h3>
<h3 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 1.2em; line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: blue; font-family: inherit; font-size: 18.333332061767578px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">the following new Apple product for Mother’s Day</span></h3>
<h2 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; line-height: 18.333332061767578px; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 22.5px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The iRon</span></h2>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 0.8em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="http://www.e-forwards.com/2013/02/grandpa-and-grandma-go-hi-tech/" style="border: 0px; color: #000066; font-family: inherit; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: initial; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="iRon-apple invention for women" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-38845" height="407" src="http://www.e-forwards.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/iRon-apple-invention-for-women.jpeg" style="border: none; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 14.999999046325684px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px auto; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="iRon for Grandma funny fail" width="580" /></a></div>
<h2 style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; line-height: 18.333332061767578px; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: 22.5px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">and that’s when the fight started...</span></h2>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-77586031139921138882013-02-23T07:01:00.002-05:002013-02-23T07:01:44.886-05:00Punctuation Is Important<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: red;"><b>Are students taught grammar?</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><b> Is texting the ruination of mankind?</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><b>The Modern Classroom</b></span></div>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-57107893425412759862013-02-11T10:07:00.004-05:002013-02-12T06:55:59.066-05:00TRUE LOVE For Valentine's Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">Great message and picture about true love!</span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-size: large;"><b>Just in time for Valentine's Day </b></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-size: large;"><b>but relevant for every day!</b></span></div>
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
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Golden Years Humor
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1754344046740114053.post-57188865414217966812013-02-09T18:17:00.004-05:002013-02-09T18:17:50.860-05:00lying all these years joke<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<h1 class="book-heading" style="background-color: white;">
The Toy…</h1>
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There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. </div>
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Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. </div>
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She looked down… and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device… a vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic. </div>
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“You impotent jerk,” She screamed at him, “How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!”</div>
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The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: “I'll explain the toy… you explain the kids.”</div>
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Golden Years Humor
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